Tribute to Tonya

Tonya - 

Tonya is now gone.

It is hard to believe.

Harder to bear.

She was a light that now shines from within all who knew her.

 I first met Tonya while she was dating my "baby" brother - 

She called him while he was out at Jasper's bachelor party a couple of nights before my wedding to tell him she was pregnant.  

 She and I spent many nights on the phone through her pregnancy.

She was immediately a sister to me.  She and Nate even drove out to where I was vacationing on the beach just 2 weeks after her Peach was born so that we could meet the new little bundle!

A year later, they were married in a small town in North Carolina, her home.

Adele and Dylan - cousins; best friends from the beginning and still today.

the whole family, including Mikayla from Nate's first marriage

 She was good for my brother. She was good for us.

 When she joined our family, it was like a 'click' - a perfect fit. She was the bigger sister I never had but always needed. 

Even after her marriage to my brother fell apart, Tonya remained a vital part of our lives.  Here she is teaching my sweet-pea how to vacuum when we visited last year.

Ains always loved getting some 'sugar' (kisses) from her Auntie Tonya, who threatened to give sugar regularly. :)

 

Our kids are like peas & carrots - so happy to be cousins!

 We look forward to many more happy times with this sweet boy!

Who was Tonya?

She was a sister, friend, daughter, mother.  She was warm, nurturing, kind, on-the-ball, spit-fire, salt of the earth, GOOD. She told it like it was.  She was 'mother' to nearly everyone - setting you straight if you needed it.  She lived life in the moment so fully.  She reached out to you through her eyes, and soft hugs.  Only a year older than me, she was wise, mature, and so 'together'. She loved butterflies. Cameras. She loved to learn new things. She was loyal, grounded, and looked at things straight-on.  She laughed. She cried. She worried. She loved. Tonya embraced life and lived it. She was well-placed in the career path of Human Resources.  She was well on her way to making a name for herself in photography.  She took beautiful photos. Here are just a few:

~ she took these 2 of my baby girl ~

Oh Tonya, how my heart aches for you.

Her last living week, we were blessed with her presence. 

She and Dylan visited us in D.C. - a long awaited trip.

The trip was centered around Dyl's hero: Abe Lincoln.  But we made time for lots of play, pancake making, dinner cooking, restaurant visiting, book reading, park going, monument visiting and tourist viewing, lounging, visiting my school and attending Ainsley's daycare egg-hunt, dancing to her favorite: Usher, shopping, movie watching: Nim's Island, and of course late night talks.  I only wish I had more pictures.

But the memories of that week will live strong.

at Ford's Theatre - watching a presentation and dramatic retelling by a Park Ranger in costume

It was both dark and moving. Neither of us kept dry eyes.

notice the detail of the hands - he's sitting like Lincoln's statue in the official, current, President's seat in Ford's Theatre

working her magic with the camera - and wearing flip flops as she is notorious for

silly time - so much laughter that week!

Friday morning - the morning of her death... we made pancakes and colored Easter eggs

the kids' hands were well-painted by the end... she said their hands were gonna "smell like feet" - they sure did!

the clean up

Tonya and Dyl waved good-bye in their black, Ford Mustang convertible -- saying "This will be Dyl's car when he turns 16!"  Ains and I waved farewell and said, "Next time, we'll come to you."

We did.

Under unexpected circumstances.

the procession

Every day, the sun rises. 

Every night, the sun sets.

Every moment - you live.  In my heart and in the hearts of those who knew you.

Thank you, Tonya.  Thank you for your gift of life to us. For being who you were. For taking care of all of us in your own very special and amazing way.  Of all the things you were - I will never forget how incredible of a mother you were.  Above all else, you were a GREAT MOM.  One of the best I've EVER known.  I will hold what I learned from you close to my heart for as long as I live.

 

 Tonya Ann Dail Watt

1976 - 2011